Sunday, April 20, 2008
Sunday morning.
yesterday night was the most drama of all nights i've ever spent in my entire life.
when we finally stepped onto the bus-stop after finishing our ushering work for the night, i was in the midst of taking off my earrings that i had the horrible realisation that my gold necklace had slipped onto my neck and the gold, diamond encrusted pendant was missing! the necklace and pendant was a gift from my grandma, and it was only the first time i was wearing it yesterday. (i found it too tacky to go with anything, except all black, which i had to don on for ushering duty)
me and dear started to comb the streets and roads, which actually had quite a heavy stream of cars driving straight towards us every once in a while, which made looking for that small little thing pretty hard. i never knew that there were so many things that glittered in the dark, in the grass there were little slips of plastic, on the pavement there were shiny rock mixed with concrete. that, combined with the fact that it was nighttime, and it was a pretty long walk from the theatre to the bus-stop, sucked. dear was lugging around laptop and a heavy bag of clothes and books, and i knew his shoulders and neck were aching like hell, but he didn't complain one bit and just kept bending his tired neck in search for the pendant. (which made me feel even worse when i think back to what i did to him later in the night)
we traced and retraced and re-retraced our steps over and over again. but to no avail. people were staring at us as we walked on the busy roads like it was ours, keeping our head down, and squatted on grass in an attempt to see clearer.
i know this sounds damn corny, but it was with a heavy heart that i finally stepped onto the bus to head back home.
and then another drama started, with me getting pissed (i have got to do something about my pettiness and horrid temper) at dear for trivial matters, and ending in me stomping up a bus, with tears-filled eyes as dear shouted at me to come back. and i stupidly stupidly stupidly (i cant say this enough) ignored him, and stared straight ahead stubbornly when i was finally seated in the bus, although i know he was outside, waiting for me to look at him.
I picked up his call after missing two of them, and he gave me a scolding that i totally deserved, before hanging up on me. and so began my long stream of calls that were not to be picked up, and 'im sorry dear' smses that were not to be replied to, and him answering and hanging up before i could say a word, to make it clear to me he was darn bent on not talking to me.
and i totally deserved that.
and that thought just kept haunting me throughout the entire ride from Outram to Jurong East, and everytime the train stopped and opened its doors at a train station, my heart kept telling me to get out of the train and board the one opposite, to tanah merah. but my tired legs kept saying it's okay, i should just head to his house tomorrow morning, and that it was already almost midnight, and i sure wouldn't catch any last train back if i decided to get out of this train i was in.
and this tirade of thoughts just kept flooding me, and i was mentally exhausted with a pounding headache, by the time i reached Jurong East, one stop away from my home. and it was then i listened to my heart.
and got off the train, into the last train bound for tanah merah.
as the headache continued to torture me as i sat on the rather empty train, with thoughts of what i would say to him running through my head, the missing pendant suddenly popped into my already-very overloaded mind. and i had that rare stroke of genius and i decided to check if the pendant dropped in the fold of my pants, which i had folded up because it was too long.
and tadah, it was there. lying there untouched, and i was in utter disbelief when i picked it up, still shining brilliantly, and i was shocked with the realisation that the whole time me and dear had been risking our lives looking for it in gutters and on roads, it had been so close beside me through-out.
and so, after what seemed like an eternity (actually forty minutes) i finally reached tanah merah. And i climbed over and jumped down the fence i thought i never would, and leapt across a pretty wide drain, because i wanted so badly to see him.
so when one of his neighbours opened the gate, i waited near the lift, and when he appeared, i fell into his arms crying like a baby, apologising over and over again.
and by 2.30 am when i reached my house gate, finally, all was well.
yesterday night was the most drama of all nights i've ever spent in my entire life.
when we finally stepped onto the bus-stop after finishing our ushering work for the night, i was in the midst of taking off my earrings that i had the horrible realisation that my gold necklace had slipped onto my neck and the gold, diamond encrusted pendant was missing! the necklace and pendant was a gift from my grandma, and it was only the first time i was wearing it yesterday. (i found it too tacky to go with anything, except all black, which i had to don on for ushering duty)
me and dear started to comb the streets and roads, which actually had quite a heavy stream of cars driving straight towards us every once in a while, which made looking for that small little thing pretty hard. i never knew that there were so many things that glittered in the dark, in the grass there were little slips of plastic, on the pavement there were shiny rock mixed with concrete. that, combined with the fact that it was nighttime, and it was a pretty long walk from the theatre to the bus-stop, sucked. dear was lugging around laptop and a heavy bag of clothes and books, and i knew his shoulders and neck were aching like hell, but he didn't complain one bit and just kept bending his tired neck in search for the pendant. (which made me feel even worse when i think back to what i did to him later in the night)
we traced and retraced and re-retraced our steps over and over again. but to no avail. people were staring at us as we walked on the busy roads like it was ours, keeping our head down, and squatted on grass in an attempt to see clearer.
i know this sounds damn corny, but it was with a heavy heart that i finally stepped onto the bus to head back home.
and then another drama started, with me getting pissed (i have got to do something about my pettiness and horrid temper) at dear for trivial matters, and ending in me stomping up a bus, with tears-filled eyes as dear shouted at me to come back. and i stupidly stupidly stupidly (i cant say this enough) ignored him, and stared straight ahead stubbornly when i was finally seated in the bus, although i know he was outside, waiting for me to look at him.
I picked up his call after missing two of them, and he gave me a scolding that i totally deserved, before hanging up on me. and so began my long stream of calls that were not to be picked up, and 'im sorry dear' smses that were not to be replied to, and him answering and hanging up before i could say a word, to make it clear to me he was darn bent on not talking to me.
and i totally deserved that.
and that thought just kept haunting me throughout the entire ride from Outram to Jurong East, and everytime the train stopped and opened its doors at a train station, my heart kept telling me to get out of the train and board the one opposite, to tanah merah. but my tired legs kept saying it's okay, i should just head to his house tomorrow morning, and that it was already almost midnight, and i sure wouldn't catch any last train back if i decided to get out of this train i was in.
and this tirade of thoughts just kept flooding me, and i was mentally exhausted with a pounding headache, by the time i reached Jurong East, one stop away from my home. and it was then i listened to my heart.
and got off the train, into the last train bound for tanah merah.
as the headache continued to torture me as i sat on the rather empty train, with thoughts of what i would say to him running through my head, the missing pendant suddenly popped into my already-very overloaded mind. and i had that rare stroke of genius and i decided to check if the pendant dropped in the fold of my pants, which i had folded up because it was too long.
and tadah, it was there. lying there untouched, and i was in utter disbelief when i picked it up, still shining brilliantly, and i was shocked with the realisation that the whole time me and dear had been risking our lives looking for it in gutters and on roads, it had been so close beside me through-out.
and so, after what seemed like an eternity (actually forty minutes) i finally reached tanah merah. And i climbed over and jumped down the fence i thought i never would, and leapt across a pretty wide drain, because i wanted so badly to see him.
so when one of his neighbours opened the gate, i waited near the lift, and when he appeared, i fell into his arms crying like a baby, apologising over and over again.
and by 2.30 am when i reached my house gate, finally, all was well.
can you hear the soft swoosh of the butterflies' wings. 2:18 PM.
