Tuesday, January 24, 2006
am so tempted to write "nobody reads this anymore", but lets not wallow.
sometimes i think i know what causes my flus, and headaches. but then nights when i dont use air-conditioning lead to runny-nose days, and my theories are proved wrong once in a while. its weird, its my body, but i really dont know how it runs.
a few days ago, i was chatting to my rarely-seen girl-cousin at a family reunion dinner. "soo. what course do u want to take?" she asks. "hmm. arts media design, or communicative something. i wanna be a ads-conceptual person." that was innocent me, with my bubble dreams answering.
"OHH. you dont want to go into that. you have to be the best in the arts field to be noticed , and you dont have basics, and people from LaSalle will be competing with you, and.." the tirade of cold water poured on, as the wise post-mass-communications her ticked off all the reasons why i shouldnt pursue my ambition. but she was kind enough to end with, "dont look so sad. if you really want it, then just read the curriculum and join. maybe its better than i thought." i must have been looking damn crushed.
the thing is, can i cope with maybes?
but i do want to risk it. risk not being able to fit in with the rest of the arty-farty cohort, who i assumed will be shooting profound english out of their mouths. risk failing every test i take because ive never had basics, and am so disadvantaged. risk freaking out when i see the nude model walk in. okay, actually i dont mind that last one. hahha.
so many people seem to be against it. fulfilling my dreams seem to be the right course, but regretting for life after ive chosen that path will suck.
in 'my sister's keeper'(di just lent it to me), there's this paragraph.
you know sometimes, your life seems to be like a forked road. and you decide on one path, but even as you embark on the gritty road, your eyes never leave the other.
back then, mommy always had all the answers. not anymore.
sometimes i think i know what causes my flus, and headaches. but then nights when i dont use air-conditioning lead to runny-nose days, and my theories are proved wrong once in a while. its weird, its my body, but i really dont know how it runs.
a few days ago, i was chatting to my rarely-seen girl-cousin at a family reunion dinner. "soo. what course do u want to take?" she asks. "hmm. arts media design, or communicative something. i wanna be a ads-conceptual person." that was innocent me, with my bubble dreams answering.
"OHH. you dont want to go into that. you have to be the best in the arts field to be noticed , and you dont have basics, and people from LaSalle will be competing with you, and.." the tirade of cold water poured on, as the wise post-mass-communications her ticked off all the reasons why i shouldnt pursue my ambition. but she was kind enough to end with, "dont look so sad. if you really want it, then just read the curriculum and join. maybe its better than i thought." i must have been looking damn crushed.
the thing is, can i cope with maybes?
but i do want to risk it. risk not being able to fit in with the rest of the arty-farty cohort, who i assumed will be shooting profound english out of their mouths. risk failing every test i take because ive never had basics, and am so disadvantaged. risk freaking out when i see the nude model walk in. okay, actually i dont mind that last one. hahha.
so many people seem to be against it. fulfilling my dreams seem to be the right course, but regretting for life after ive chosen that path will suck.
in 'my sister's keeper'(di just lent it to me), there's this paragraph.
you know sometimes, your life seems to be like a forked road. and you decide on one path, but even as you embark on the gritty road, your eyes never leave the other.
back then, mommy always had all the answers. not anymore.
can you hear the soft swoosh of the butterflies' wings. 10:58 AM.
